I am one of those apparently terrible human beings that no matter what I do I cannot gain weight. Please do not comment on how I should be body positive and be extremely happy with the body I have and to shut up about wanting to gain weight. I think I am one sexy mother fucker, but I have also been bullied and ridiculed for my weight and body image.
Oh the joy of having someone grab onto my protruding hip bone and uttering the words “Ew!” Do I grab onto other peoples stomachs who happen to weigh more than me and yell EW? No, because one I am not an asshole, and two because I think everyone is beautiful in the body they have and I do not have disturbed thoughts about their bodies. But thank you to the number of people that have pointed out just how gross my ribs, my hips, my spine, and my collar bone are to you. And don’t come back to us when we get upset and say “No I’m just jealous cause you’re so skinny, I was just joking around.” No you were body shaming and now I have to go home and explain to my mom why I don’t want to wear my bathing suit in the summer anymore.
2. Are you Okay?
Recently, I was working at a festival as security and although it was hilarious to have a stick figure trying to tell 300 pound drunk men that I am going to make them leave the festival, it was also a quite awkward day when my boss asked if I was okay. Now when she came up to me and asked if I was okay I thought it was because I was standing in the pouring rain for an hour, but when I replied with “Yes I’m fine.” She proceeded to say “Oh okay just making sure because you know, you’re so tiny.” She was not referring to be being cold, or tired she was referring to the fact that working a 12 hour shift must be hard because of how skinny I look. I can confidently say that she was concerned with my health because she did not ask the other females/men standing next to me. We are fine, believe it or not, we can do everything you can do.
3. How are you so Skinny?
Simply put, I don’t know.
4. Do you eat?
That’s like asking me if I have an eating disorder and it’s extremely offensive. Yeah I eat, I eat just like every other human on this planet has to or else I’ll die.
5. You like take two bites and then you’re full.
I have never once taken two bites of something and become full. I guess people just assume that that is all the amount of food we need to survive in this world. I can eat an entire pizza in front of someone and then say I’m full and I will still hear “Well you had your two bites of food so you must me.” Sarcastic or not it still pisses us off. A good majority of us don’t eat a lot at meals, because we have been eating every twenty minutes, literally been having 3 lunches a day rather than 1 large lunch. Unless you spend an entire day with us, you are not permitted to comment on our intake of food.
6. How much do you weigh?
This is a trap. Even though its a question, you actually don’t want to know the answer, and should I answer honestly, I’m gonna piss you off. I recently had someone ask me what size I was and a girl yelled out the most honest thing I have ever heard “Don’t you dare answer that.” She was referring to the fact that my telling her my size would make her ‘upset’ but the truth is that I cannot honestly answer that question without creating at least on enemy. It’s even worse with men, I have a friend who is very naturally skinny and he hates admitting his weight because he is then ridiculed. Muscle weighs more than fat, and when he tells someone that he’s 120 pounds, they know that he ain’t skinny because he’s been working out. The meat heads at the gym all know that being 200+ pounds is muscle mass.
7. I’m so jealous.
Well guess what, I’m jealous of you. I understand that everyone wants what they don’t have and that you are just being polite and complimenting me. Thank you. Though I am jealous of your curves and none protruding hip bones so much that I am attempting everything possible to gain weight, but I can’t say anything about how jealous I am of you back because I’ll look like an ass who is just trying to make other people feel better. So I stand there and awkwardly accept your compliment, and contemplate how we can change the subject.
8. OMG! You’re so Skinny.
What? I am? Why the hell didn’t anybody tell me that? I was wondering why my teacher pulled me outside of class to discuss eating disorders with me when they thought I wasn’t eating lunch when in fact I just ate it before they came to patrol my room. It also explains why my friends play the game “Whose skinnier, you, or the mannequin?” I never would have known had it not been for your observation.
9. You’re probably one of those girls that can eat anything and never gains weight. Aren’t you?
You need to go back and read that again in the most snobbish and judgemental voice you can possibly think of. This typically happens when meeting new people, usually a friend of a friend who we won’t be seeing again, and it’s like I have been shot down right away. There is no hope of us becoming friends in the future, because even if you meant it to sound nice, it came off as you hating me. But the answer is yes I am.
10. Guys love curves.
Thanks. I don’t have any, I know, but you know it’s cool, you can be body positive to your OWN body while shaming me. I get it people can be mean to you and call you fat, but you can come back and say “I have curves, I love my body #bodypositive #healthy” I can’t say “Men like skinny girls, they like bone #Healthy #skinnydoesitbetter” cause I’m gonna get punched, and I don’t think like that. Thank you for making me feel completely hideous to the male race because my breast size is an A cup.
11. Oh My God I’m So Fat.
If we even attempt to deny this claim of yours one of three things happen. We are told to shut up, we are given a dirty look, or we are told “I weigh more than you, you’re like one pound.” I don’t understand how my being less weight than you completely erases me from not thinking you’re fat. What? Just because I’m skinny that automatically makes me think everyone else is fat? And I can’t come to defend you and deny the false accusations you are making about yourself? Stop calling yourself fat just because I am skinny, don’t compare yourself to me. I refuse to be the comparison you use to make yourself feel terrible. You are beautiful.
All women and men of all shapes and sizes are beautiful, it’s okay to love the body that you are in and it’s okay to wish you looked like someone else. We all want what we don’t have but it’s wrong to assume that one body type is better than another. Too many people tease me about being too skinny because they claim that they’re jealous, and they say that we shouldn’t take it seriously because we’re skinny and everyone wants to be. Well guess what your words can hurt just as badly as mine could hurt you. I get that you’re trying to be funny or complimentary but we’re sick of hearing “You’re so skinny.” just as much as you would hate hearing “You’re so fat.”